The Lure of Insanity Dating

The Lure of Insanity Dating

Have you ever heard a word and it triggered a thought about a time or an event in your life?

Last week, I was riding along in the car with my brother having an interesting conversation, like many other interesting conversations we’ve had in the past. We discussed how certain behaviors and/or bad practices cause harm to individuals when practiced repetitively.

During the discussion, my brother began reciting the definition of insanity. I chimed along in perfect synchronization “doing the same thing over and over, but expecting different results”.

Although our conversation topic did not involve dating, the definition of insanity triggered thoughts of my past dating habits.

Oh yeah, I was an insane dater! I went from one bad relationship to another. As the definition states, I continued to expect different results.

Because of the years of rejection I suffered, oftentimes, it was very difficult for me to end a relationship. I found myself staying in relationships longer than I intended because I didn’t want to face the pain of rejection.

After my divorce to my husband of eight years, I determined to focus on my relationship with God.  Also, I told myself not to get sexually involved with anyone and to not get in a serious relationship unless the person was seriously saved and marriage material.

The very next relationship after my divorce lasted six years. My determination grew wings and flew the coop. As expected, the no sex mantra in a six-year in a relationship ran right out the door. As for marriage, I loved him more than I loved my ex-husband, but I noticed some changes in him that I couldn’t understand. Then the Lord gave me a dream about him.

The dream revealed a destructive path he was on that would effect me if I remained in the relationship. As a result, I was able to end the relationship, which wasn’t as painful as I initially thought it would be.

I continued to date during those years, but I continued to choose men who were more interested in having sex with me than marrying me.

Some said they were Christians and attended church. However, that usually was the extent of their faith. They had no substantial relationship with Christ.

But by the grace of God, I eventually began to recognize their true intentions for me beforehand, which saved me from getting involved with them.

Over time, by reading God’s Word, I began to understand my worth and the enemy’s plan to keep me bound to fornication.

By the Holy Spirit, I began to realize that I was actually self-rejecting myself by constantly choosing the wrong men who I knew were not good for me.

I wanted to please God with my whole body, especially since I had given away such a precious part of myself to men for most of my life.

I wanted to gain back control in that area of my life and offer my body as a living sacrifice to God.

Therefore, I knew I had to stop dating the same type of men and expecting to get different results, because the men I dated generally only wanted me for my body. Thus, ultimately, effecting my walk with Christ.

Take the time to look back at your past dating habits. Have you found yourself dating the same type of man, time and time again?

If you answered yes, you too, have fallen prey to the lure of insanity dating.

Break the cycle by recognizing your worth. You are a precious gem to the Father, so much so that He sent His only Son to die on the cross for you.

He loves you with an everlasting love. Unlike man’s conditional love, God’s love for you is unconditional. You will never be able to do anything to stop Him from loving you. You are always on His mind.

The bible says in Isiah 49: 15-16 “Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne? Though she may forget, I will not forget you! See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands; your walls are ever before me.”

I love the Amplified version of  verse 16 which states ” Behold, I have indelibly imprinted (tattooed a picture of) you on the palm of each of My hands; …”

Can you imagine an imprinted (tattooed) picture of yourself on the palm of God’s hands? Gives me goosebumps just thinking about it!

Come back to the Father. He knows how to love you exactly the way you need to be loved. After all, He is your Creator and the One who loved you first.

Father I pray for every individual who is caught in the vicious cycle of dating outside of Your will for their lives. Father, reveal your love in their hearts. I pray every woman reading this prayer will be able to comprehend the breadth, the length, the depth, and height of Christ’s love for her. Lord, expose every plan of the enemy sent as a distraction and a hindrance to furthering the original plan and purpose You have for her life. In the Mighty Name of Jesus I pray. Amen!

Check out this video by one of my favorite poets, Janette..ikz,  titled “I Will Wait For You”.  It will make you laugh and think.  If it does not appear on your screen, please click on the link to view it.

The video is courtesy of YouTube.

May His love overwhelm you,

Marilyn J.



9 thoughts on “The Lure of Insanity Dating”

  1. I love the Amplified version of verse 16 which states ” Behold, I have indelibly imprinted (tattooed a picture of) you on the palm of each of My hands; …”
    Can you imagine an imprinted (tattooed) picture of yourself on the palm of God’s hands?

    That just melts my heart!

  2. Hi Marilyn! I love that definition of insanity. It applies to just about every situation. But you took it to heart in your dating life, and it really helped you see some destructive habits. God can use anything to teach, even your dreams. He loves you so much! Any habit is hard to break, and seeing the problem is always the beginning of healing.

    What a wonderful ‘light’ this post is, helping us all to see how precious we are. And how we deserve to respect ourselves, and to get that respect from others too. Really good, thank you.

    1. Hi Ceil! Yes, it’s so true that habits (bad habits) are hard to break. I’m glad God worked in my life to reveal the destructive habits I allowed to take over me for so many years. As Joyce Meyer states “I’m not where I want to be, but thank God I’m not where I used to be”. Thanks for stopping by. Many blessing to you Ceil!

  3. Thank you for your honesty in this post! I had a similar past as a teen and the cycle didn’t break until I was saved as a young adult, which is when I realized my worth ❤ This quote of yours is dead on: “Break the cycle by recognizing your worth.”

    1. I am so glad you can appreciate my honesty about my past. My prayer is to speak into the lives of many by sharing my struggles in hopes many will relate and allow God’s love to guide their lives. Thank you so much for your visit. God bless you! 🙂

  4. When I read this immediately the story about the Prodigal son came to me. It wasn’t until he came to himself that brought about change. Your comment about “actually self-rejecting” triggered something within…Most of my life I’ve been rejected but it didn’t hit home, until I read this. I too, was rejecting myself in the past by accepting guys into my life who didn’t add any value.

    The YouTube video you’ve shared was awesome. I’m a huge fan of poetry.

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